A Spiritual Stretch –
Beyond the Backyard
When I was a young child growing up with my two brothers in
Colorado, my parents set many boundaries to keep us safe. One such boundary was that when we were
little, we were to play in our own backyard.
I am sure they had removed everything obviously dangerous from the yard
and they had it fenced to keep us from wandering beyond this haven of safety. I can remember being very content playing on
the 1960’s metal swing set, digging in the sandbox and jumping on an old
tractor inner tube that my father brought home for us. We were safe, as safe as could be.
However, I wasn’t too old before I wanted to go play at my
friend’s house, or roller skate around the block, or ride my bicycle down the
sidewalk. There was a whole world out
there to explore! So, my parents
renegotiated the boundary over and over throughout my growing up years. Pretty soon, I could go down the street on my
bike, walk to school by myself, and play in a vacant lot nearby. One of my childhood friends and I recently
reminisced about traipsing around the entire downtown area of our small town
all by ourselves – sitting on all of the sofas at a furniture store and riding
the only elevator in town up and down repeatedly. It was a gradual process, but eventually, I
was physically free of the backyard. I
could roam and explore.
Like most parents, mine never gave me permission to leave
our own SPIRITUAL backyard. They truly
believed that I was safer to stay inside the religion that they introduced to
me, and expected me to stay within the spiritual boundaries they had
selected. They may have encouraged me
to be brave and meet my friend down the street for a walk, but they never
encouraged me to explore other churches or religions to see if something
different might fit me better. Of upmost
concern was my salvation, and they believed that our fundamental religion was
the only ticket to the heaven of their belief. I think my experience in this aspect of
growing up was typical.
Several years ago, I was working with a coaching client who
was intensely attracted to a meditation center she drove by on her normal
commute. She would slow down and read
the signs on the building. She felt very drawn by the possibilities within
those walls, however she never stopped.
When we discussed her background, she explained her religious
upbringing, but said that years ago she stopped attending any church. She said that she missed a relationship with
God, but couldn’t bear the thought of going to church and shared about the
meditation center of her longings. When
I encouraged her to try it, she balked.
“My father would never understand or approve!” she explained. She was trapped in her own spiritual
backyard.
Over several sessions, we explored the reality that her
father loved her deeply and only wanted the best for her. His religion served him well, so he had
shared it with her out of love. He too wanted
her to be “saved”, and his religious beliefs provided for that. He had not explored beyond the religion that
his parents had given to him, and he expected the same of her. That was just the way this family worked and
she felt that he would tolerate her not going to church at all easier than
accepting her trying something new.
Other religions were portrayed as scary or sinful, so she was terrified
to explore.
One aspect of fully growing up is discovering and choosing
your own spiritual path, your own relationship with a Higher Power or God. You may return to your own backyard and find
that it is perfectly beautiful and sustaining, or you may look back on it with
fondness and find that there is an entire world out there to explore
spiritually. You may decide that the
prayers that you recited as a child still serve your needs as an adult, or you
may find other words to express your communication with the Divine are more
fluid and fitting now.
Stretching and growing is just as vital to thriving in our
spiritual being as it is to our physical being.
Run and play and explore!
God is
everywhere!
